Saturday, October 23, 2010

Friday, October 22, 2010


Do you hate meetings? Lot's of folks do including my wife.

I find them a part of life.

But in order to have a meeting, of any type, you need people.

DLM posted this recently about how to meet people to meet with!

7 Ways To Instantly Meet Like Minded People

Posted: 27 Sep 2010 11:35 AM PDT

Have you ever felt that it's hard to meet like-minded people? Such as, people with the same interests. Or, people with common goals and aspirations. And last but not least, people with whom you can build a rapport and camaraderie with.

I do, sometimes. While I love and appreciate every single one of my friends, sometimes I wish they share some of my passions, so we could bond over them. For example, I blog full-time as part of my business - I spend at least 5-6 hours managing and writing at my blog. On the other hand, none of my friends so much as own a personal blog, much less partake in professional blogging. I'm also self-employed, and self-manage my schedules and working hours. On the other hand, most of my friends work in 9-5 jobs, which are great, but our different visions in our careers made it hard to have a meaningful discussion in the area. Rather than constructively build off each others' ideas which only someone with related background can do, most of the time it's more of a "listen", "nod", "ask a simple question" routine.

While it may seem tough to meet like-minded people sometimes, remember that there are ultimately 6.8 billion people out there in the world. Out of this group, there's going to be at least tens of thousands of people who at least share a common interest with you! It's not about meeting just one specific person who shares all your interests, but about opening yourself to different people who share at least a common interest. Meeting like-minded people doesn't have to be hard - it's about taking the right steps. Here are 7 tips to meet like-minded people:
  1. People you know
    It may not seem intuitive, but your immediate circle of contacts is a great way to meet like-minded people. Have you heard of the 6-degrees of separation? It's the idea that anyone on Earth is connected to each other via 6 degrees of contact, or less. In fact, with the internet, it's probably less than 6 degrees. How does this idea help you meet like-minded people? Firstly, if your friends have similar interests as you, they probably know many other people who have the same interests too, since birds of the same feather tend to flock together. Secondly, even if they don't share your interests, they might know someone who does. Even beyond that, word of mouth is an excellent referral tool - by just asking around and extending to 2nd degree, or 3rd degree contacts, you might find yourself a list of like-minded new friends.

  2. Your Workplace
    The second place which most people overlook is their workplace (or school, if you're studying). This is applicable if you're in a career that you enjoy, and a company which you like. Why do I say so? Every company, especially long-standing ones, have a regimented set of recruitment criteria, which includes certain personality traits and hard skills. For you and others to be recruited in the same company, that means all of you share core similarities. Not only that, being part of the same company means you're part of a bigger culture, sharing same knowledge and thinking patterns (to a degree).

    Many of my best friends today came from my previous workplace. Before I started working there, most people I know had passive, negative orientations toward life. I wished to know more people who were more forward looking. My previous company was specific in recruiting people who were driven and self-motivated, so when I entered the company I found myself surrounded by a sea of people who were very talented and driven. It was like a dream come true. In the end I forged many valuable friendships in my 2 years there, which continued to stay on even after I left later on to pursue my passion in personal development.

  3. Clubs and Communities
    Existing clubs and communities are a great way to quickly meet like-minded individuals. See each community as a central hub that attracts people with the same interests. For example, a writers club would attract people who are interested in writing, whether on a recreational or professional level. Online forums and communities on Linked in and Facebook are a great way to start off. Offline communities will include meet-up groups, recreational clubs, interest groups, related classes and membership societies. I took up Japanese as a third language when I was in school and later when I graduated, and each time I met a group of people who were passionate about Japanese language, its culture and also anime. It was fun connecting on a deep level on those areas, where the regular person wouldn't know much about them. Check out, which is a great resource for interest groups. If you're shy about meeting new people, these 10 useful tips to make new friends might come in handy.

  4. Start a blog
    This one isn't exactly instant, and it's probably not a tip most people will use, but it definitely works. I started The Personal Excellence Blog 2 years ago, sharing my best advice on how to live life in excellence. While it started off with 0 readers (as with all websites), it quickly grew. With each person that visited the blog, the ones who were interested in personal growth and conscious living stayed on and subscribed to the newsletter. Many of them would silently read my articles, while a small handful would reach out to connect, via the comments, email, Facebook or Twitter.

    Today, I'm lucky to be connected with a buzzing community of over 10,000 like-minded readers who are passionate about personal growth and living a better life. In the past 2 years, I've been contacted by over a thousand different people, some for business purposes, some for networking, and many just reaching out to connect. I would meet up with a small handful of them, even international readers (who fly in to Singapore, where I live). In fact, this week I'm meeting a fellow reader and blogger from overseas, and next month I'll be meeting a reader-turned-friend from Thailand as well! Many of these new friends are amazing people that I'd never have had the opportunity to know otherwise, if not for the blog.

    When you run a blog, others know about how you are like, based on what you write and how you write. The like-minded individuals who enjoy and appreciate your thoughts will stay on for more, while those who don't will eventually leave. Before you know it, you're in the company of a huge community of like-minded individuals, who are diverse in their own ways at the same time.

  5. Networking events/Meet-Ups
    I've been to a number of networking events and some of them can be quite pointless, degenerating into empty mingling and name card exchanging. However, there are valuable networking events out there, and it's about picking the ones that meet your needs. Different networking events attract different audiences, so carefully choose the ones that you go to. What are the kind of people you are interested in? Who are the people you'd like to meet? Pick the events most relevant to them.

  6. Attend a related workshop/seminar
    A workshop or seminar is essentially a gathering of like-minded individuals who wish to achieve a common objective. Else, the individuals wouldn't invest time or money in the workshop. Check out the workshops out there, whether on the internet, online communities or newspapers. If you're reading Dumb Little Man, you are probably interested in personal development. There are many hundreds of high quality self-help workshops out there - simply attending to any one will allow you to meet other people who are passionate about personal development as well. I've only attended a couple of self-help workshops to date, and just from the workshops alone I've befriended over 30 like-minded individuals and have developed great relationships with a number of them.

  7. Reaching out to them
    Direct, 1-1 contact is a targeted and efficient approach. With social media and internet today, it's now extremely easy to do this.

    • Linked in: You can search within a certain industry or specialization, which will bring up a select group of people. After that, you can read more about their profiles and connect with each individual on a personal level.
    • Facebook: Browse interest groups and check out members in the groups.
    • Blogs: Check out blogs on topics of your interest. See if the writer is someone you'll be interested to connect with.

    While some might feel weird doing this, it's quite commonplace today, and many use it for networking purposes. You probably won't get responses from all of them, and it's okay too. Be genuine and polite in your message. Introduce yourself, how you know about him/her, your interest in connecting and why. You never know who you might meet in the process.
How about you?

Which tips can you use to meet new like-minded friends? Do you have any tips of your own on meeting like-minded individuals? Feel free to share in the comments area.

Written on 9/27/2010 by Celestine Chua. Celestine writes at The Personal Excellence Blog, where she shares her best advice on how to achieve personal excellence and live your best life. Get her RSS feed directly and add her on Twitter @celestinechua. If you like this article, you will enjoy one of her top articles: 101 Things To Do Before You Die.Photo Credit: Kiran Kumar G

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Thursday, October 21, 2010

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Embracing Differences

Friday morning before climbing out of bed, I did my usual routine.

I woke up to the Pat White show on 1250 The River, WGL; one of my 4 radio stations.

I tuned into Morning Joe on MSNBC.

And I checked my email on my Droid.

There was a blog update from one of my daughters who is brutally and yet tactfully honest.

Rachael tackled the subject of Bullies and recent events that have been in the news.

And with her permission I'll share her post with you in a moment.

A couple years ago, my wife went to a political demonstration and lovingly confronted both factions of opposing sides on the health care debate and by talking to them and with them, was able to bring out the common ground that everyone agreed on instead of the issues that divided them.

Embracing Differences comes after we find our common ground. Try it and you may be surprised at what you discover.

Now here's my daughter:

It gets better

I'm not gay.

I'm just different.

I'd say I only experienced a very moderate amount of bullying and teasing at school.

But for a small farm school in the middle of nowhere, Indiana, we had our fair share of freaks & geeks.

And gay and lesbian teens.

Some of them were my friends. Hiding out together in creative writing and drama clubs, we carved out a little safe place.
I couldn't guess what happened during the rest of the day for some of my friends.

For me, early in high school I was eschewed as a nerd, a freak, ass-kisser, brown-noser, and suck up. Once I started dating, I was mostly referred to as a slut.
I was more or less oblivious to a lot of the commentary, since I didn't have that many friends to feed me the rumor mill.

And the things I did hear, while stinging, I managed to learn to disregard. I was a smart kid, and I got along with my teachers very well, which allowed me a lot of privileges (in that limited high school world). And I was very flirtatious, touchy, and I had sex.
All and all I escaped relatively unscathed.

Unfortunately, there are a lot of kids who don't.
The media has been full of blips of kids, gay, lesbian, or just different, who have taken their own lives because of bullying and tormenting from their peers and lack of support from those who are supposed to care for them. My heart breaks for these kids.

At a very terrible and low point in my life, I did contemplate its end.

It's not a secret, and my amazing family is the reason I am here, and whole. And happy.
The point is, there are places where bigotry and narrow-mindedness don't exist. Sometimes you can go there, sometimes you have to make them for yourself. And after you find a place where you can love yourself, and surround yourself with people who love you, it gets better.

Writer Dan Savage has begun an amazing project of compiling inspirational stories of men and women (and everything in between) telling their stories of how their lives have gotten better even though at some point they thought that it never would. Check them out at

Also, there is an amazing resource for young adults (or anyone) who is feeling lost, depressed, or suicidal. Apparently these people have been helping kids since I was in high school, but they've gotten a fresh boost of publicity and attention along with the deaths of the kids they're trying to help.

Take a look, remember that the only way to end bullying and intolerance is to lead and love by example, and help end this tragedy.

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Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Tech Tuesday Tip

Tech Tips for the Non-Techie:

Got an old computer, want to keep it running reasonably fast?

I have a couple of real life tricks that have helped us recently.

In 2003 I bought a couple of computers from the local Gateway store. Gateway was a brand that my former father in law always bought from and in 2003 they had retail stores, not just a mail order.

One of those computers we still have, the desktop. My wife uses it these days, but at one time, we had 5 or 6 people who used it. Each person had their own account desktop settings and a couple of them loaded music and pictures on the desktop computer.

As a result, over the past few years the computer was taking longer and longer to complete tasks. So a couple weeks ago I decided to do some pruning. See, everyone now had their own computer laptops, even my wife, but she preferred to use the desktop and I wanted to squeeze a few more years of life out of it.

I bought an external hard drive last year and moved all the pictures, music and documents from everyone's accounts off the computer's internal hard drive to my external drive. I left my wife's stuff alone.

Then I began deleting everyone else's accounts and did ran a couple of clean up programs.

CCleaner does a decent job and after you run the Cleaner option and the Registry option, there's another feature in the Cleaner section that you should run, but only when you don't need your computer for awhile. And by awhile, I mean hours. Maybe overnight.

Check the Wipe Free Space box and run the Cleaner option again.

Once a week run CCleaner, depending on how big your hard drive is, and how much time you use your computer every week. I use CCleaner on my 3 year old laptop every other day.

One other simple tip to keep your computer fresh and ready to perform. Shut it down every 24 hours. Like at bedtime. Or when you leave the office.

There used to be arguments both for and against leaving your computer on all the time.

Leave it on and you reduce the stress of the computer starting.
Turn it off and you extend it's "lifespan".

I now say turn it off which will allow it to reset some of the settings and junk that accumulated while you were working.

I told you this was for the non-techie, and I meant it!

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Monday, October 18, 2010

Cleaning and Drinking

Do them both like a man.

From the AOM Blog:

How to Clean Like a Man

Editor’s note: This is a guest post from Joe Weber.

Part of becoming a man is picking up after yourself. Your mom used to do that for you. Being a man means doing it yourself. You could be the best dressed guy in town with an endless bankroll, but if your home looks like a 14 year old lives there, you’re dead in the eyes of women. But taking pride in cleanliness isn’t just about attracting the ladies. Keeping your place clean strengthens your discipline and attention to detail, keeps your organized and productive, and simply makes you feel good.

My mom was committed to cleaning the same way Pete Rose was committed to gambling. Every Saturday morning she was up cleaning and therefore the entire family was up helping. Top to bottom including the basement, cleaning the entire house.

Turns out having a mother addicted to a dust free home will teach you a few things. Here are the five steps you should consider following to clean your place quickly and efficiently-like a man. Complete with tools and techniques that’ll make it all go easier.

Step 1: Crack a beer and put on some loud music.

There’s no way around it, the next 45 – 90 minutes won’t be fun. Might as well enjoy a decent beer and listen to your favorite album while you’re at it. Loud and fast-tempo music will help keep the boredom away. So skip the Pink Floyd. High alcohol microbrews will make the experience more tolerable. So try something heavy.

Step 2: Put all the clutter away.

No sense in cleaning around the clutter. Your place will still look like a pit if you do. The stack of mail, the shoes you took off while watching the game, the bottles that never got taken out after poker night. Clean it all up. Spend at least 10 minutes doing this.

Step 3: Dust using a Swiffer Duster

What a revolution the Swiffer hath wrought. Not unlike the evolution of toilet paper (i.e.: leaves begat Sears Roebuck catalog pages begat Charmin), the Swiffer is the third and greatest leap in cleaning technology for its category. The feather duster just pushes dust around. An old sock or rag with pledge or Endust is a mess. The Swiffer uses static electricity and an almost infinite amount of soft dust grabbing fibers to clean. Use it on everything from wood to electronics. Don’t doubt it. It works. Pick things up and dust under them. Don’t dust around.

Step 3.5: Crack another beer.

Stay with the heavy ABV microbrew. This ain’t over.

Step 4: Vacuum. Everything. And consider investing in a Dyson.

Approach your vacuum purchase like you would your premier pair of dress shoes. Sometimes it’s worth the extra money if you can spend it. If you can’t? Then no pressure. But don’t skimp on the vacuum purchase if you have the cash and especially if you have a dog or three.

Vacuum everything. Use the bristle brush on counter-tops that you stand and eat over (there will be crumbs). Use the long corner attachment to run along the outer edge of any tiled floors (air currents deposit pet hair and other stuff there). Lastly, take that bristle brush and move onto the bathroom.

Step 5: The Bathroom

Who knows why men avoid cleaning their bathrooms. I do it for whatever reason too. Out of sight, out of mind, no? You open the door, you do your business, you flush and wash your hands (most of the time), and the door gets closed again. Too bad it’s a deal breaker for most women if your bathroom is disgusting. Here’s a fail-safe plan to making your bathroom woman friendly:

  • Vacuum anything that’s not wet with the bristle brush.
  • Apply solid layer of toilet bowl cleaner to bowl and let sit.
  • Wipe down mirror with paper towel and glass cleaner.
  • Using same paper towel and all purpose cleaner, wipe down the sink.
  • Scrub toilet bowl and flush.
  • Get the entire toilet nice and wet with all-purpose cleaner. Use toilet paper to clean tank. Flush. Use toilet paper to clean seat, then rim (in that order.) Flush. Use toilet paper to clean outer bowl. Flush.

Done. Finish the beer. Consider a third.

What are your tips for cleaning your place quickly and efficiently? Share them with us in the comments!


Joe Weber is the Director and Editor of where affordable style is the one and only focus. He believes that living right, living well, and looking good doesn’t mean you should go broke in the process.

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Sunday, October 17, 2010

7 from 7 that = $7,000,000,000

from the DLM Blog:

7 Amazing Lessons from 7 Distinguished Billionaires

Posted: 16 Mar 2010 11:51 AM PDT

Schneier, Mark Cuban, Doctorow
They say that a million dollars in $100 bills is 43 inches high, but a billion dollars in $100 bills is almost three times the height of the Empire State building. A million dollars in $100 bills would weigh 22 pounds, but a billion dollars would weigh 11 tons.

Suffice it to say that the accumulation and maintenance of a billion dollars requires much wisdom. Today I want to look at seven amazing lessons from seven of the world’s most famous billionaires. These billionaires range from Bill Gates to Mark Cuban and each of these individuals have accomplished amazing things.

There are many things that we can learn from them so enough with the monologue; here we go!

7 Amazing Lessons from 7 Distinguished Billionaires
  1. Look for Opportunities

    “It's through curiosity and looking at opportunities in new ways that we've always mapped our path at Dell. There's always an opportunity to make a difference.” – Michael Dell, Founder, CEO, and Chairman of Dell Inc.

    If you never look for an opportunity, you will never find one. The Wright Brothers were looking to see if it was possible for man to fly, they didn’t stumble upon it, they were looking for it. What are you looking for? The Scripture says seek and ye shall find, knock and the door will be open to you.

  2. Believe in Yourself

    “I always knew I was destined for greatness.” – Oprah, Media Mogul

    As the famous poem goes, “If you think you’re outclassed, you are, you have to think high to rise, you must be sure of yourself, before you can ever win a prize.” You must believe in “you” before anybody else will. Oprah believed that she would be a success, and she is. What do you believe about yourself, whatever it is, that’s what you will become.

  3. Create an Atmosphere of Success

    “It's better to hang out with people better than you. Pick out associates whose behavior is better than yours and you'll drift in that direction.” – Warren Buffet, Investor

    You can’t soar with the eagles, if you spend your time hanging with the chickens. Find people who are going where you want to go, and “conspire to aspire before you expire.” Atmosphere is critical, diligently guard who enters your inner-circle. Your friends are a prophecy of your future.

  4. Empower Others

    “As we look ahead into the next century, leaders will be those who empower others.” – Bill Gates, Co-founder and Former CEO of Microsoft, currently the 2nd richest man in the world behind Carlos Slim.

    Who are you empowering, who are you helping, who needs you. You can’t go forward without helping others go forward. Instead of being concerned about how you’re going to get ahead, find a way to help others get ahead, and you will get ahead in the process. Empower others and you will empower yourself.

  5. Focus

    “In the end, you're measured not by how much you undertake but by what you finally accomplish.” – Donald Trump, Real Estate Investor/Developer, TV Personality

    Don’t be a “jack of all trades” and master of none. Don’t bite-off more than you can chew. Decide what you want to accomplish in your life, and spend your time accomplishing it. Work hard, take breaks, and in the end, if your focus is single, you will have accomplished it.

  6. Learn From Your Mistakes

    “I'm the type that thinks if you don't learn from history, you're doomed to repeat it.” – Mark Cuban, Internet Entrepreneur and NBA Team Owner

    It sounds simple, but many people live a life of repeating the same mistakes over and over again.

    The “cow in the ditch” example below gives us a pattern for how we should deal with our mistakes.

    Here are the three steps you should follow whenever a "cow ends up in your ditch:"

    Step 1: Get Cow Out of Ditch
    Step 2: Find Out How Cow Got in Ditch
    Step 3: Make Sure Cow Does Not Get in Ditch Again

    Using these three simple steps, you can solve many of life’s problems (from debt to relationship issues).

  7. Only Go Forward

    “We will go forward, ... We will never go back.” – Michael Bloomberg, current New York City Mayor and Founder of Bloomberg LP

    You can’t make much progress forward if you keep on taking steps backwards.

    Make a decision to go forward, never settle, never stagnate, life is about growth, it’s about development. You are supposed to grow, you’re supposed to become all that you are capable of becoming, so go forward and never look back!
Thank you for reading and be sure to pass this article along!

Additional Details on the Image Used: Bruce Schneier, Mark Cuban and Cory Doctorow. Mark is the only billionaire although I am sure the others are working in it. Bruce and Cory were recipients, along with Yochai Benkler, at the EFF Pioneer Awards.

Written on 3/16/2010 by Mr. Self Development who is a motivational author that offers a practical guide to success and wealth; support him by visiting his blog at .Photo Credit: eschipul

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