Sunday, December 13, 2009


Forgiveness is a wonderful thing. If you expect anyone to be perfect, you will be disapointed. However, we need to make an attempt to be a person of honor. The DLM Blog wrote about this recently:

These Personal Traits That Are More Valuable Than A Nike Endorsement Deal

Posted: 10 Dec 2009 02:27 PM PST

I am not mentioning any names but in light of the current events surrounding us, we should all take time to examine ourselves to see if we are being all that we should be. Don't get me wrong, I am not telling you how to lead your life, I am not telling you what to eat, or when to workout. I'm telling you to be sure that your eyes are open and not to forget the things your Kindergarten teacher and hopefully your parents taught you.

As we go through our days, hundreds of motivations jump in and then jump off our radars. How we react to these motivations defines us. In fact, it determines how you feel inside every morning as you take your first glance in the mirror.

There is no eraser or delete key in life. If you haven't already begun, consider incorporating the following into your life. Not whimsically, but make a real effort. In fact, do it for all of 2010 and see if you notice a difference in your life and happiness levels.
  • Being Truthful
    Never lie. Your words should reflect all that you say and do. If you think and do one thing, but say the opposite of those thoughts and actions, that's a lie. We've all heard the saying, "A man's word is his bond." If only that was so. Sometimes we lie to cover up an indiscretion. Sometimes we lie to make ourselves appear to be better than we are. Sometimes we lie to keep from hurting someone's feelings. I firmly believe, because it has been my experience, that eventually all lies will be exposed. Ultimately, there is no benefit to telling a lie.

  • Being Faithful
    Since when has it become okay to cheat on our wives? Unfaithfulness is becoming so commonplace that many people accept it and thus do nothing about it. We turn our heads. We hide behind statements like "It's none of my business," and we do nothing.

    Have you ever attended a wedding? Even if you aren't married, there is a pretty good chance that you've actually witnessed one. Maybe it was held at a church; maybe it wasn't. Doesn't matter. A man and a woman stand up in front of a crowd of people (as few as a crowd of 2; as many as hundreds -- maybe thousands), and proclaim their undying love and faithfulness to each other. Why do you think there are witnesses? It is for accountability.

    When we cheat, those who witnessed our proclamation of eternal faith to our spouse should say, "Hey, what's the deal? We saw you with our own eyes -- we heard you with our own ears -- you promised to love, honor, and cherish your spouse as long as you both shall live!" If you cheat, you should have to stand up in front all those people who witnessed your wedding and explain your actions. You should have to explain why you couldn't communicate with your spouse and resolve things in a reasonable fashion.

  • Being Honorable
    In both your professional and personal lives, be honorable. What does that mean, exactly? To be honorable means to be highly respected or esteemed. In order for you to be highly respected or esteemed, you must be unselfish; integrity must be your middle name (if not your first). Be an honorable husband/wife. Following these guidelines, we must always put our wife's/husband's needs ahead of our own, and we must have strong moral principles. I don't feel that "strong moral principles" is a topic that is open to interpretation. To many, their God sets those standards. To others, it's common sense, or learned from books or parents. Honor is not up for discussion; it's meaning is set in stone. You have it or you don't.

  • Being Trustworthy
    Can you be relied upon to say and do what is right all the time? If so, then you are worthy of the trust of your peers. Others believe that you won't do wrong; nor will you tell a lie. Being trustworthy is a very big deal. You don't get to decide whether you are trustworthy, though. Others will decide that for themselves. You can have some input into their decision, though -- by actually being trustworthy.

  • Being Respectful
    In all that you do, be respectful of others. This could be read as another form of the "Do unto others..." saying. For the sake of this discussion, though, let's disregard any physical connotation that this may bring to mind, such as punching or slapping. Often when we are disrespectful, we hurt others far worse than if we actually had punched them. Cheating on your spouse is the ultimate form of disrespect. Our spouses always deserve our respect. No matter what! Remember the end of "Do unto others..."? It isn't "as you have had done to you" -- no, it's "as you would have them do unto you." You can't make the world a better place by reciprocating bad with bad.
Today we so often hear a phrase like "raising the bar," to indicate that a new minimum standard has been established. When it comes to these 5 traits listed above, the minimum standard should be a wall over which we must climb or leap. People can, and so often do, walk right under the bar.

What other character traits would you deem as defining? Do you feel that you have all of those traits? Does that question make you cringe?

Written on 12/10/2009 by David Jones. David blogs at Control Yourself! A blog focusing on becoming better men, and various men's issues.Photo Credit: p@r@noid

1 comment:

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