Writers Block

I have seen many talented people give up.

I have seen many people quit.

I've done it in some areas of life and I'm sure you have too.

A few years ago I committed myself to regular blog writing and other social media.

So I post at least 14 times a week here, and between 3 and 4 times a day on my Collective Wisdom blog. These are relatively painless because I've developed a formula that works for me.

I also write once a week here, which is sometimes more of a challenge, because unlike the other blogs, this one contains original thoughts on advertising, marketing and sales.

Yesterday as I was cleaning out my email inbox I came accross this from the LifeDev blog:

I’ve Got Nothing To Say

Photo by ideacreamanuelaPps

I’m going to level with you: I’ve got nothing to write today. Not a single thing.

So why are you still reading? You’re probably thinking that I’m going to turn this into a lesson of some sort, but that’s just the thing: I can’t. Because I can’t think of a single thing to write, and I’ve been staring at my monitor for the last 37 minutes.

You see, creating is going to be harder some days than others. The faucet just won’t turn on, nothing will click. There will be days where the best thing you can do is sit down and stare ahead blankly without inspiration.

But the important thing is that you do it anyway, and that’s where most of us give up. There’s something powerful about going head-to-head with Lack of Motivation and seeing who’s more stubborn. Anyone who is a “professional creative” (writer, artist, etc.) that creates every day will tell you the same thing: you just have to do it.

How many days did Michelangelo show up not wanting to paint during the four years it took him to finish the Sistine Chapel? Or how many of the 2, 632 consecutive baseball games did Cal Ripken Jr. not want to play?

It’s making the commitment, sitting down, and staring at the screen. Or holding the brush. Or picking up the guitar. The act of making the effort, even when there’s nothing behind it, allows things to happen anyway.

And eventually something will happen.

Fort Wayne Site-of-the-Day

Media Monday continues with another of my radio stations. Click here to go there.

Car Repair Guide

This morning, I was looking for estimates for some repairs for my car and found this handy site:

http://repairpal.com/

Fort Wayne Site-of-the-Day

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Saturday Night Classic Music Video: John

Elton John did the classic John Lennon tune....

If Lennon was alive today, he would be 69. Instead on December 8th his fans will mourn his death (1980).

Fort Wayne Site-of-the-Day

I discovered this site last month. Click here to go there.

Video Time: Movie Quotes

One of the most difficult tasks my wife and I face is deciding which movie to rent. Sometimes we'll revert to a classic:

Fort Wayne Site-of-the-Day

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Less Worry

We are caught up between two very busy holidays right now, and there may be some pressure in your life due to family gatherings, Christmas parties, etc.

A couple months ago we had a conversation with one of our kids about how to manage their time traveling to see everyone for the holidays and urged her to follow this advice from the DLM blog:

Should You Care What Other People Think of You?

Posted: 02 Oct 2009 06:29 AM PDT

Even the introverts amongst us – myself included! – are social beings. It’s natural for us to pay attention to what other people might be thinking. The problem is, worrying about what other people think can lead us to take on too many commitments, deny our true goals and passions, settle for a life of “people-pleasing”.

On the other hand, paying no heed at all to how others might be thinking of us can lead to professional and personal relationships turning sour.

Here are some steps that’ll help you find a healthy balance.

Step 1: Pay Attention – But Don’t Worry
Worrying rarely gets you anywhere in life. Don’t spend time feeling unhappy or anxious about how others might be thinking of you. Try not to let your emotions cloud the issue here, and don’t spend time trying to “mind-read” other people.

You’re often your own worst critic – and frankly, most people have far too much on your minds to care whether you’re slightly over/under-dressed for a situation, for instance.

Step 2: Does Their Opinion Matter?
Stop caring what random strangers think of you. If you like to sing as you walk round your local park, and someone passing gives you a weird look – it really doesn’t matter. Their opinion isn’t going to affect you in any way.

The same goes for all sorts of situations. For example, a problem that many overweight people have when they’re trying to get in shape is that they’d like to go to the gym or to an exercise class, but they’re worried what people will think of them. Ask yourself “can what they think hurt me?” or “does their opinion matter?” until you feel confident enough to go ahead with what you want.

Step 3: Use the Feedback
If you get a negative reaction from a key figure in your life, like your boss, then pay attention. If your boss is fanatical about keeping a tidy desk and you couldn’t care less, it’s worth adjusting your behavior – especially if your boss scowls every time s/he sees your desk.

Don’t make assumptions about what other people are thinking, though: make sure you really do have evidence. In the absence of any real evidence, try assuming the best! For example, if someone sends you a rather curt email, assume that they were just in a hurry – don’t start worrying over whether they dislike you.

Step 4: Put Your Goals First
Perhaps you have very different goals to your family and friends. Perhaps you’re keen to get a great grade in school, but your friends think you should just join them in partying and having a laugh. It doesn’t really matter what they think: your goals should be more important than their opinion.

The same goes for all sorts of situations. Maybe you’ve ended up in a career you hate because it’s what your parents wanted you to do. Your goals should never be dictated by other people.

(If you don’t have any explicit goals, that might be why you’re prone to worrying about what other people think – because you don’t have your own plan for your life. You might want to read 11 Useful Tips on Setting Goals and Achieving Them.)

Step 5: Value Your Values
If other people scoff at your values, ignore them. Perhaps you’d like to read more about personal development and self-improvement, but you’re worried your friends would just laugh at you if they found out. Maybe you’re keen to do your best at work even when the boss is away – but everyone else thinks you’re an idiot for not joining them in slacking off.

Whatever the situation, make sure you’re holding tight to your values, rather than being swept along by other people’s. Many people will actually be impressed (even if they don’t say so) – because you’ve had the conviction to stick to what you believe is important.

Step 6: Remember That You Don’t Have to be Popular
Life isn’t like high school: it doesn’t matter if you’re not popular. You can’t please everyone anyway – so don’t even try. Say “no” to commitments that you don’t want to take on. Be willing to do something that goes against the crowd, if it’s what you truly believe in.

Of course, there are a few people in life who you might want to be popular with – your spouse, your kids, and your boss, for example. But in general, most people’s opinions and thoughts about you are unlikely to have any real effect. Plus, if you behave as “yourself” and people don’t like you – would you really want them to be your friends anyway?

Do you find yourself worrying about what other people think? How do you work past these worries? Are there times when it is appropriate to pay attention to how other people think about you?

Written on 10/02/2009 by Ali Hale. Ali is a professional writer and blogger, and a part-time postgraduate student of creative writing. If you need a hand with any sort of written project, drop her a line (ali@aliventures.com) or check out her website at Aliventures.

Photo Credit: jonrawlinson

Fort Wayne Site-of-the-Day

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Video Time: Mr. W

Classic Clip to put a smile on your face:

Fort Wayne Site-of-the-Day

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Get Er Done

Here we are in the final month of 2009.

You and I have had 11 months to accomplish what we intended at the beginning of the year. And odds are that there are one or two items left to accomplish. Here's help from the DLM Blog:

What Are You Putting Off? How to Get On With It in 3 Steps

Posted: 28 Nov 2009 07:07 AM PST

Most of us put things off. Sometimes, we put off getting started or making progress on big projects... and other times, we put off small tasks that sound simple on paper but seem like a big effort to do.

The problem is, the more we put something off, the harder it is to get going on it. Our resistance to doing it gets greater and greater ... and often, the task becomes more difficult or more unpleasant the longer we put it off.

Maybe we’re putting off a trip to the dentist because we’d rather not have to pay for any treatment (but the longer we leave it, the more it’s likely to cost). Maybe we’re putting off phoning that disgruntled customer (but the longer we leave it, the more likely they are to get even more annoyed ... and get in touch with our boss).

Whatever you’re putting off today, here’s a three-step process to getting on with it.

1. Figure Out Why
   Firstly, there’s always a reason why you’re putting something off. Don’t dismiss your reluctance or resistance to something as being “stupid” or inexplicable. It might not seem logical, but there’s often a good reason behind it.
   
   Get honest here. What’s the benefit of not getting that task done?
   
   • If you don’t start your diet, you can keep on eating whatever you want, whenever you want
   
   
   • If you don’t read that book for school, you’ll have more time to play computer games
   
   
   • If you don’t make that phone call, you won’t have to face possible rejection
   
   
   • If you don’t start writing your novel, you’ll never have to face up to the fact that you might not be as good a writer as you want to be (yet)
   
   
   • If you don’t quit smoking, you won’t have to go through withdrawal symptoms and you’ll still have your stress-relief
   Just figuring out the reason why can help you break down your resistance to the task. If you admit that you’re putting off that phone call because it’s scary (not because it’s going to take five hours or cost you a fortune in call charges or something), it’s easier to rise above your fear.


2. Break It Down
   The next step is to break your task down. A lot of the tasks we put off are difficult because we’re not clear about what we actually need to do to complete them. We’re not just putting off acting – we’re putting off the hard thinking work that needs to go in.
   
   By breaking a task into bite-sized chunks, it’s much easier to cut down the resistance. If you have “write my resume” on your task list for today, you’ll almost instantly start feeling reluctant to do it. You’ve got no idea how much work needs to go in, and you don’t know where to begin.
   
   Instead, break that task into chunks, perhaps like this:
   
   • List all my qualifications
   
   
   • Find the dates and details for my work history
   
   
   • Email two potential referees to ensure they’re happy to provide a reference
   
   
   • Brainstorm about the skills I’ve gained from volunteering
   ... and so on.
   
   It doesn’t look so daunting now, does it?
   


3. Take the First Action
   The third step is to simply do the first task on that broken-down list. Don’t think too hard about it: the more you think about how much work it’ll be or how much you dislike it, the more difficult it will be to get started.
   
   Just take the plunge! Jump right in and get going – and you’ll find that your resistance to the task vanishes almost straight away.

Bonus Step: Get Over Yourself
If you still feel stuck, this might be why: In a lot of cases, your reason for resisting a task might simply be that it seems, well, boring or hard or not much fun at all.

Sometimes, you just have to get over yourself and accept that you do have to do some hard things in order to reach your goals. In fact, most goals worth achieving will not be easy 100% of the time.

Naomi Dunford (from the must-read small business marketing blog IttyBiz) puts this way better than I could:

Every time you don’t want to do something, think you shouldn’t have too, or find yourself using words like “uncomfortable” or “nervous”, run your excuses through the Fourth Grade BS Detector.

Would an entrepreneurial 10-year-old agree with your logic or would they hear, “But I don’t waaaaaaaaaaaaaaanna”?

Choose your next actions accordingly.

(Naomi Dunford, Introducing the Incredible Business-Building Bullshit Detector, IttyBiz)

What are you putting off today? Why? How does it break down? What’s the first step? Tell us about it in the comments!

Written on 11/28/2009 by Ali Hale. Ali is a professional writer and blogger, and a part-time postgraduate student of creative writing. If you need a hand with any sort of written project, drop her a line (ali@aliventures.com) or check out her website at Aliventures.

Photo Credit: SuperFantastic

Fort Wayne Site-of-the-Day

Time for a blog. Click here to go there if you like babies...